I got a call yesterday on a test I forgot I had, a 24-hour urine test for 5-HIAA. My doctor ordered it after she found out I turn bright red before I fall over. It came back high, but I’m waiting to TALK to the doctor about WTF that means and what to do now. The Internet reveals that this is a pretty sensitive and specific test for cancer so I’m really anxious. And of course it’s a weird and exotic rare cancer, my specialty.
Of course I called everyone I knew so they could commiserate with me, and I discovered that this turning red thing is a known thing to everyone but me: I obviously am never looking at myself when I start to pass out. My coworkers were all like oh yeah, your ears get red and then your cheekbones turn red and if you still don’t sit down you turn pale as a ghost. Well…good to know, I guess. I did ask if they had any OTHER helpful information for me. (No.)
I feel tortured waiting to hear from my doctor about this.